And I……

What If It rains as the night drops the curtains
Instead of walking you to the door of sleep
You read my eyes telling you to stay
Hiding behind the voice of my heart
What If we sit together On our favorite spot
While you look at the sky
I contemplate your details……
Your eyes, your voice,
the beard on your face
Your smile, your laughter
Your lips murmuring my name

On a dark night
sitting under the moonlight
whispering through silence and smiles
leaving our lips hopeless……away
catching a moment to meet
as the thunder breaks
I feel your strong arms around my waist
your heartbeats, I count your eye lashes
and memorize all of your details

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Sometimes

I

Wonder….

What great disasters I carry that happiness never lasts long

Sometimes I wonder….

Why do people lie while looking into my eyes and expect me to believe them

Sometimes I wonder If they know….

I might

be reckless

but I’m not stupid_

A little beyond the boundaries

Pious, pure and angelic titles
Behind them hides a sinful damsel
Holding back words that make you sin
On your feet I would like to spin

Hopelessly romantic wild
Behind that mask a devil hides
Your touch sculpting me into a sensual muse
Verses played by you giving me cues

Fragmented seducing kisses as they seam
I let my feelings slip through my sleeves
I hid for long and they were ceased
A gentle stroke inviting lust and love
Complaints, wishes, dreams and a little sigh
A tainted smile on lips and shine in eyes
A sudden hug and I fell from skies
Scattered
Shattered
My pieces thrive
Stripped my Soul
Those ugly scars; yikes
Stitches on heart
Tears in my eyes
The grievous dance in your arms
With painful laughters, echoes and cries
So many screams, an existence full of ache
Soulfully soulless
Hopefully hopeless
reasonably unreasonable
…..

And ……..


Beyond the boundaries
My words start losing purity_

Nameless Feelings.4

If you hold me through those autumn leaves
So tight leaving shivers to my spine
Making me crave for you more as our eyes meet
From a distance I feel myself breathing in you_

I just want Solitude

Leave me alone

I’m tired

Already have plenty to deal with

Why the fuck this world keep adding more to it

I’m like a strayed wanderer without a destination other than grave

Even if I dun want it

Every freaking word would descend deep….deep in my soul and torture it like crazy

I can’t please everyone yet I couldn’t please even a single one

You never know how hard it is to hold back

Do you know to be silent…. silent….so damn silent and then you feel your heart thundering and soul struck by lightning

You never know how hard I’m trying to not to be a person I never wanna be

But what I’m ….. I dunno

A joke? Pitiable… miserable someone who act so strong but break like a glass when alone … No more likely a curse that can be lifted only by death

And I await ….. Like any next second I hear it steps and soul slips away

I dunno if it would be peaceful there

But I hope

I hope it’s gonna be peaceful there

I can’t fight people …. already tired of fig

I’ll Be a Good Girl….

large (27)That Day _____

I told my mom

“I’ll be a good girl”.

I’ll numb all of the pain residing in my Heart 

I’ll dig a grave and bury it to stop

I told my mom

“Don’t worry anymore”

I’ll get rid of my only desire my only wish and dream

I’ll clench it so hard

It won’t even breath

I told my mom…..

…… I’ll do as you please

But……..

I couldn’t tell her

Please try to understand me

I die every day craving for It

And bury myself at night In silent screams

I kill it every day but it throbs in my heart

Torture me in my smiles and hugs me when I’m about to fall apart

Please ask me once…

How much it’s so hard

______ I’ll be a good girl

 

For     how      long

I’m  afraid ___

 

 

 

 

Real Pain

Do you know……

° what’s real pain ?

It’s Silent and  Calm 

It devours your Voice

You lose your ability

To shout it to the World _ 

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The Volcano inside me

Mountains

Night

An enchanting moon

Waves dancing in the sea

I’ve all of these in my one Breath

Silent

Avoidance

Whispers

A sad willow tree

On the corner of my

There’s a cliff

So high looking down it’s so deep

Someone’s standing there and that’s me

I escaped

From the world

My bruised feet

My heart covered in scars

My face washed with tears

But now there’s no fear

The Volcano inside me breaths a lot of pain breaking all the chains and there are no more restraints

Now it got a perfect place to erupt……

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