What If It rains as the night drops the curtains Instead of walking you to the door of sleep You read my eyes telling you to stay Hiding behind the voice of my heart What If we sit together On our favorite spot While you look at the sky I contemplate your details…… Your eyes, your voice, the beard on your face Your smile, your laughter Your lips murmuring my name
On a dark night sitting under the moonlight whispering through silence and smiles leaving our lips hopeless……away catching a moment to meet as the thunder breaks I feel your strong arms around my waist your heartbeats, I count your eye lashes and memorize all of your details
I’m not good at choosing words Some are like bombs throwing at people Some are so self destructive and I dunno how to protect myself from myself until it destroys a great part of me
You have at least someone to hold your hand when you fall __ I don’t..
I just have criticism waiting for me…
Lucky are those who get appreciated. I don’t even know how does it feels.
If you hold me through those autumn leaves So tight leaving shivers to my spine Making me crave for you more as our eyes meet From a distance I feel myself breathing in you_
You said you will have 4 kids __ two daughters and two sons.
You wanted me to stay single and teach your children but laughing while saying ” no I don’t want a perverty tutor for my kids, you will spoil them”.
You shared your dreams with me.
You had tell everyone ” Hey Listen ! I changed this grumpy rascal into a chatterbox , It was me who took away her frown but she can kick your ass If you hurt me”.
You were a plethora of laughter who had argue with me every time I said ” What If I die before you ” ____ and you would say ” What If I do “……
And You Won……
I pray ___ May your soul be at peace
May your grave be filled with warm and peaceful light
____ It is …. unbelievable like someone told me a joke… Feels like you are still there asking me to pick the white rose stealthily from the garden in front of principal office
Still feels like you waving your hand and yelling ” Moon you idiot, you are late , we were waiting for you “….
I still see those times ___ how you used to put your shoe on a chair to save my seat and complain cz I was always late than the rest…
How can I forget those times , we had sneak into last seat on last period just to have fun while eating mandarins and throwing messages written on papers and pass till professor would say ” I can see you well from this spot “……
Times you fought and argue with seniors for me saying ” She got a bad temper but she has a nice heart ”
You will stay in my memories forever ….. 25April2020
I’m sorry
For loving you like
It’s gonna be the last time
I’m sorry
For
Loving you so violently
I’m sorry
That I’ve gone so
damn crazy for you
It’s like I won’t have enough of you
I’m sorry for being greedy
But I lust your love
Yes I am crazy one who talk about love
When have never been in love
But would you believe me If I say I’ve experienced it through people’s eyes …. how badly they need it yet I don’t want you to love me for I won’t be able to love you back as I don’t know how does it feels.
I am Maniac who gets Hyper
A selfish being who gets tired of Caring
A little savage yes I feel so much but end up hurting everyone cause I still have no Idea how to get a hold on my possessiveness
Yeah! I know i am damn aggressive and violent and I don’t mind if i have to Run away or to kill
To make my heart feel at peace.
Yeah! I know nothing about people and its like nuisance to me
I accept I am not normal
And I dun mind getting the hell outa here
But……
Why I’m so helpless
I’m chained….