I Just…..

And I……

What If It rains as the night drops the curtains
Instead of walking you to the door of sleep
You read my eyes telling you to stay
Hiding behind the voice of my heart
What If we sit together On our favorite spot
While you look at the sky
I contemplate your details……
Your eyes, your voice,
the beard on your face
Your smile, your laughter
Your lips murmuring my name

On a dark night
sitting under the moonlight
whispering through silence and smiles
leaving our lips hopeless……away
catching a moment to meet
as the thunder breaks
I feel your strong arms around my waist
your heartbeats, I count your eye lashes
and memorize all of your details

Wanderer

Gone astray as I
Leave behind no
Marks and walk
Like an armour
Made of moonlight
A sword unsheath

In midnight as my
Feet bleed of struggle
I rise in rainstorm
A dance on lightening
With a roar of thunder
I cry out my heart
So full of ache as the
Nature hides me under
It’s wings so wide and
A soul on fire burning
The pain I admire

The scars so velvety
Drunk and dance
I dance In pain In darkness
Away astray stay stray
A wild soul caged
I want to bleed through
Words and cry my pen
Intimates the silvery lines

The life I don’t wanna live, makes me want to live it….

I can’t tell anything about myself

What I’ve decided… what’s decided for me by someone for my future….

What the people around me expect from me…..what kinda person they wanna see in me……

Unexpected events happen suddenly…. Like an invisible force invading ….. Sometimes it makes me happy sometimes It makes me ache…

Sometime I just feel like how great is the divine power….. am I being helped out …smth very close to happen, right at the door but It suddenly stops…..

My life…..Its leaves me speechless how It goes on

I don’t have the power

………

So I’ve stopped telling …… What’s the plan for the future.

…… I’m curious to see ……

I lust your love

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I’m sorry
For loving you like
It’s gonna be the last time
I’m sorry
For
Loving you so violently
I’m sorry
That I’ve gone so
damn crazy for you
It’s like I won’t have enough of you
I’m sorry for being greedy
But I lust your love

I wish for you with searing desires

Awoken feelings

I crave for you

I want you like eternity
I want all of you…

Don’t love me

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Yes I am crazy one who talk about love
When have never been in love
But would you believe me If I say I’ve experienced it through people’s eyes …. how badly they need it yet I don’t want you to love me for I won’t be able to love you back as I don’t know how does it feels.
I am Maniac who gets Hyper
A selfish being who gets tired of Caring
A little savage yes I feel so much but end up hurting everyone cause I still have no Idea how to get a hold on my possessiveness
Yeah! I know i am damn aggressive and violent and I don’t mind if i have to Run away or to kill
To make my heart feel at peace.
Yeah! I know nothing about people and its like nuisance to me
I accept I am not normal
And I dun mind getting the hell outa here
But……
Why I’m so helpless
I’m chained….

A smile full of life…

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laughter, smile and 

Glistening eyes

The most beautiful combination and behind It is hiding a heavy amount of pain 

You know it’s so rich,  so full of life

When you know how does it feel to be sad

To be empty while trying to be happy

Tortured by pain alone with nobody there to comfort

But when they get to see the smile for real on your face;  It lit up an unextinguished fire in the hearts ___

Unfathomed

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I tear off the mask

As I enter my room

Hang the laughters on the entrance

I embrace the solitude

Have you ever felt the intense need of to be alone…….

 

 

 

 

I’ll Be a Good Girl….

large (27)That Day _____

I told my mom

“I’ll be a good girl”.

I’ll numb all of the pain residing in my Heart 

I’ll dig a grave and bury it to stop

I told my mom

“Don’t worry anymore”

I’ll get rid of my only desire my only wish and dream

I’ll clench it so hard

It won’t even breath

I told my mom…..

…… I’ll do as you please

But……..

I couldn’t tell her

Please try to understand me

I die every day craving for It

And bury myself at night In silent screams

I kill it every day but it throbs in my heart

Torture me in my smiles and hugs me when I’m about to fall apart

Please ask me once…

How much it’s so hard

______ I’ll be a good girl

 

For     how      long

I’m  afraid ___

 

 

 

 

Real Pain

Do you know……

° what’s real pain ?

It’s Silent and  Calm 

It devours your Voice

You lose your ability

To shout it to the World _ 

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